My Job Sucks...But No More!!

So, if anyone has spent a few minutes with me over the last six or seven months and has asked me about my job, you have received one of three typical responses:

1. It's ok.
2. It totally blows.
3. I think it will get better.

Well, it never did get better and now...it's over. I have left Tetra Financial Group and will be joining a company based in Orem called StoresOnline.com. This is a sales position which involves travelling one week on/one week off schedule. What this means is I will be in a city (or country, since this company also sells in the UK and Canada) for five to six days and then I come back home and will be home for one full week. It's a bummer to be gone that long but it's nice to be able to be home and not have work to worry about work.

If you've ever been in a job that questioned every thing you've ever supposed about yourself, it is not fun. Maybe there should be a primer for someone to follow if they find themselves in a work position that they loathe.

Here are some signs that should tell you clearly you need to run away from your job:

• You wake up in the morning, every morning, and consider calling in sick.
• You pick your music very carefully for your drive in because you know it will be the only pleasurable thing in your life for the next eight hours.
• You try to park in different parking spaces every day to break up the monotony. But then you realize all the spaces are the same and it doesn't really help.
  
• You get on the elevator and push "4" for your floor and the electronic voice comes on and says "Four" and you want to punch through the control panel and rip out the tiny little chip that holds this electronic voice and smash it into tiny, tiny pieces.
• You are putting your food in the refrigerator and the other person in the kitchen (doesn't matter who it is) says, "Hey, it's almost Friday!" and you have to control yourself from yelling back at them, "Hey, but it's FUCKING NOT IS IT!!"
• You turn on your computer, sit in your chair and stare at your monitor and sigh. Then you sigh again. Just as you're about to sigh again, your work mate in an adjoining cubicle says, "Hey Tucker, shut the hell up. I don't want to be here either."
• As you're making your 98th or 99th phone call of the day (150 calls per day is the goal), and you leave your 50th or 60th voicemail and you know it won't be returned, you understand more clearly than ever in your life the saying, "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result." Insanity approaches with every phone dial.
• When Friday does come and you walk out at 5 o'clock, an incredible, heavy, depressing sensation comes over because you realize that you have to be back at your job in just 72 hours.
• When you get home, and it's a perfect sunny early evening, and you have a lot of options in front of you (bike ride, walk, hit golf balls, mow the lawn, hang on the porch with a beverage), the only thing you want to do is put on your sweats, pull your hoodie over your head and lie down in bed for the rest of the night, the blackest of black thoughts piercing your fevered, exhausted brain.

Hope that helps everyone. I'm very happy today. So happy.

You have no idea.

Whiskey, Lemons and Chocolate

7:10pm Friday night

I think I'm going to the liquor store.

The night is still very hot, almost like a furnace blast blowing across the porch. Dinner is done and the water fight has ended.

Dad, can I come with you?


Really? Why do you want to go to the liquor store? I'm not going anywhere else.


I just want to spend time with you. Is that ok?


Absolutely. Let me get my keys and flip flops.


I unlock the door and sliding into the car seat is similar to rolling into a sleeping bag that has been sitting on the lawn during the midday summer hours--stifling. I turn on the CD player.

Is this Tool?


Yeah.


Is it new?


No, one of their releases from 2001 I think.

I pull out onto 1300 East and head south. Not many cars on the road for a Friday night. At 1300 South, I turn west. As we drive by a neighbor's house on that street, a neighbor we both don't care for, we make stinky faces. At the same time. We both laugh at this. Now turning north on 1100 East.

Hey, can we come back to Liberty Fresh and get some lemons?


No. We don't need lemons, do we?


Please? They are sooooo good and you can even use one for your beer.


I'm not having beer tonight, I'm having whiskey. That's why we're going to the liquor store.


Well, still, they are really good.


True. OK, we'll get some on the way back.

Across 1700 South now and passing the Scientology office right next to the Post Office. Those Scientologists are a tricky bunch. Hard to get a read on them. Not Christians, not Muslims, not Buddhists and not atheists. Not even nihilists. I'm going to declare them aliens. Changing the music now to the iPod. CSS.

This is a good song. Who is this?


CSS.


Are they speaking Spanish?


No, Portugese I think. They are from Brazil.


What's this song called?


'Music is my Hot Hot Sex'.


He makes a face.


Um, ok. It's still cool.


Now pulling into the liquor store. Busy night. Weekend has arrived, it is summer and it is time to party. An abundance of parking spaces however. It's also walking weather. At least it is for the drunks who can walk from Fairmont Park. Tonight, it's mostly middle aged women getting wine for parties, young couples getting gin and vodka and actually a few dads with fathers and daughters grabbing exotic beers and small pints of the hard stuff. We enter. A policeman says hi. We say hi and continue walking on in.

I know that guy! I've talked to that policeman before, at the jewelry store at the Gateway. I was asking him about his gun. Wow, that is cool.


You know the policeman at the liquor store? That is random dude.


No, seriously, I know him. He probably doesn't remember me.


Well, go say hi.


No, that's ok. Where are we going?


To the whiskey aisle, I told you.


90 seconds later we are back in the car with the booty. CSS comes back on.

I really like this song. Can we start it over?


Sure.

The song commences. The beat is setting a certain mood, the one you wait all winter to find. A hot summer evening mood.

Dad, what does whiskey taste like?


I would say carmel but kind of sour carmel that burns your throat on the way down. But it doesn't really hurt.


(yucky face being made) Gross. That sounds horrible. Why do you want it?


I like to mix it with Coke. It has less calories than beer if I mix it with Coke Zero.


Why do you even drink it? Do you need it?


No, I don't need it. I just like to relax with an adult beverage on a weekend.


Now pulling into Liberty Heights Fresh. This place is also busy. Two guys pull up next to us and get out at the same time. I walk ahead, a nice breeze cruising through the parking lot, and open up the door for them. They say thank you. I feel a small nudge.

(whispering) Gay.


What?


(whispering again) Those guys are gay.


Yeah? So?


Just sayin'.


Glad you identified them. Everyone needs love and happiness. Don't you agree?


Yeah...where are the lemons?


We locate them in the middle of the store. They are at the top of a display of really good looking fruit. I love this place. A neighborhood garden two blocks from our front door.

How do you pick a good lemon?


Look for a deep color, and they should be a little soft but not too much. Smell them, they should be really pungent.


(inhaling) Wow, they smell great. Holy crap, I want to eat one now.


We reach the check out line and survey the chocolate brownies. The are made with exotic chocolate and were baked today. I pick one up.

I need this brownie. I mean, I need it.


I'd rather have a piece of their bread.


Really? Over this luscious bit of chocolate heaven? Come on man, this brownie is money. You usually can't say no to a treat.


OK, let's get the brownie.

We pay and walk out, just slightly ahead of a family with a daughter that looks about 12 years old. She steps out in front of us and holds open the door.

Thanks!


She smiles.


(whispering as we get into the car) She's kind of hot.


Yeah?


Yeah. I mean, I'm not going to ask her out or anything or ask her to go with me. But, she's hot.


I put the car in D and then change my mind and put it in R. As I reverse, I realize I could have gone forward and pulled onto 1100 East a lot easier. Now I have to basically do a U turn to head North again.

You just pulled a Lucy.


A what?


A Lucy. You know, when you do something kind of dumb? Like Lucy, on that show, she's kind of a klutz?


Oh I know about Lucy. How do you know about Lucy?


I've seen the show at my dad's. Christa pulls Lucies all the time. She once spilled water into her purse and it soaked everything.


That sucks.


That's a Lucy.

The sun is a little lower now as we pull into the driveway. The CSS song is winding down and the cat is lounging further up on the driveway. Our hands full of good things, we shuffle across the porch and head inside.

Friday night begins.

4th of July--Song of the Week--Great Movie

Golfing at Palisade G.C. It was so beautiful up there and the greens were just as wicked as when I played Junior Golf. Gabe played pretty well, Riley, not so much. But he looked good.

Jil loved driving the cart around but she was pursued by a nasty Wolf who thought he could hit a few shots here and there. His golf game is not as good as his biking. Jil's cart driving was superb.

Voo and AJ in the parade. I think Lane is also in front of Voo enjoying the ride.

Gabe riding randomly in the parade. It's the best parade in the state because no one cares if you are in it or not. Just go with it and be a star on Manti's Main Street for, oh, about 2 minutes.

Karl, Shellie, Joanne, and Barb. Weather was perfect and the oxygen was flowing freely.

None of us could figure out why the Manti Country Village Motel had C.T.R. on its sign. It should be an obvious acronym: Choose the Right. But...the Manti Country Village just felt so WRONG this time around: the stinky mildew in our room, the broken doorknob on Larry and Becky's room (and the constant in and out of young people keeping sleepy Wolf awake at night) and a few other oddities here and there. The only thing that felt right about it was Karl and Joanne's room which was pimped out. Big screen TV, new furniture, etc. It also had a very large oxygen making machine in there that we had to lug in and out . But Karlito felt pretty good most of the time!

Getting ready to ride from the cabin up to the Skyline. Gabe was pretty nervous about this ride because the first 45 minutes is a fairly strenuous climb. He was a little shaky at first but got himself together and finished strong. Wyatt, on the other hand, started strong and finished...in the bushes somewhere. When Wyatt finally caught up to us after we waited a bit for him, Gabe said, "Jimmy, what's wrong with you? You're a GROWN MAN and I'm just a little kid and I'm beating you. What's up my man?" Wyatt did the bike ride of shame on the way home.

It is very green up at the cabin right now--but this afternoon it rained a bit on us after our ATV ride over to Blue Lake. I look pretty happy here, must have been drinking already.

So much love at the cabin!!!

We are in front of the convenience store in Nephi. Gabe is very happy because I bought him something. Fatherhood is pretty easy if you have cash.

Song of the Week: 'Summer's End' by Foo Fighters

I have been playing this song pretty much non-stop all week. It's in the Playlist along with Slipknot, 'Vendetta', the other song I've obsessed over this week. And, finally, some Shiny Toy Guns for flavor.

Great Movie: Gone Baby Gone

Jil and I saw this movie the Sunday night after we returned from Sanpete County. It stars Casey Affleck and is directed by Ben Affleck. There are few movies that truly haunt me--Boys Don't Cry and Funny Games come immediately to mind--and this is one of them. It's about a couple who are private detectives and are hired to find a little girl missing from their neighborhood. It's set in Boston and the narrative eventually brings in some pretty good actors such as Ed Harris but it's Casey Affleck's character that is the best. The last 20 minutes of this movie have occupied a sizable portion of my brain for two weeks now. Go rent it.