Sunday, January 31, 2010

Grammy Post 2: Think Pink! (7:42 to 8:30)


I am also a big fan of Pink. I've read several articles on Pink and she is one determined woman. She apparently works nonstop and now...has just basically stripped down to nothing. So, ok. Gabe is really watching closely now. The acrobatics are kind of nice and hypnotic. How does she not get dizzy, you ask? I learned this tip from my friend and Twitter buddy, Cris Angel--you have to keep your eyes from moving all over. Keep them steady in your head and you won't lose your equilibrium. And now the water? I guess everyone below is getting a quick cool down. To show all of your body like that takes some bravery so good on you Pink. Oh, and her voice is awesome.

KEITH URBAN ALERT! Jil is really watching closely now. I've written about Jil's fascination with Keith in earlier blogs. Her obsession for him remains undiminished.

BEST NEW ARTIST IS...Zac Brown Band. OK, here is fact about Zac Brown: he toured 314 days last year. What Zac Brown does before every show, which I think is about the coolest thing ever, is cook dinner for 150 fans that are part of his VIP fan club. He makes barbeque with his secret sauce and then feeds all these people, hangs out with them, and just gets to know his fans. I don't know one song of Zac Browns but I love him. He might, he just might, get me into country.

Don't hold your breath.


And now...the black eyed peas. neat. looks like The Gimp!!! He totally has the Gimp head gear on!! Way to go will!! I sit here and wonder how much money these idiots make and it is making me very angry. We need to write a song, just one song, that gets picked up in some famous movie or becomes a popular Christmas tune and live off the royalties. And then play it when we're on the Grammys and have a bunch of other idiots dressed like speakers walk around and gesticulate wildly. What does that Indian dude and the other black dude actually do? Can you name them? No. It's the will and Fergie show. Those other dingbats are just riding on some pretty glammed-out coattails. I kid the Peas but I actually think they throw down a mean beat and are pretty harmless. Does anyone remember the time when the Peas were an underground, socially conscious, hip hop outfit that had high ideals and more interesting music? It was about ten years ago.

PERFORMANCE: Lady Antebellum. In the Country genre and I have actually heard of these folks. Never heard them and I'm hearing them now. Yep, it's country. It sucks. The guy singing reminds me of one of those Rascal Flatts dudes, except about 40 lbs. lighter.

Rascal Flatts fat guy

Best Comedy Album? Okaaay. Hope it's Patton Oswalt. And it's not. It's Colbert. Sounds very lame and goofy. Did you know Colbert sang in a barbershop quartet and had some serious chops? And now he just thanked Jesus. So, the night is not a total loss.

Time for another cool beverage...and the Screwdriver is secured, on we go!

RECORD OF THE YEAR: come on, Kings of Leon please!!!! And it's...YES!!!!!!!!! The Followill brothers come through!!! Every time Caleb Followill gives a comment on his new found fame, he sounds disgruntled but he is right up there getting the award, drunk, and very happy. Grammys got it right this time.

ROBERT DOWNEY JR. ALERT!! Love this guy. Go watch him again in Weird Science for a perfect, a-hole performance. Now Jamie Foxx is making me laugh because I can't look at him and not laugh. Full Auto Tune mode. Hopefully 2010 will see the death of the Auto Tune. That is the voice modulating unit that basically allows a crappy singer to actually carry a tune. A crappy singer like T-Pain. Where's the hat T-Pain?? He has, by his own count, about 300 custom made top hats. He buys most of them in New Orleans from a small haberdashery.

SLASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!! The Grammys not officially do not SUCK! Go read the Slash autobiography for some insight into one of the best guitarists, not just of his generation, but of all time. And one of his favorite albums is Aerosmith "Rocks", which is my all time fave Aerosmith album.

Speaking of best guitarists, did anyone know that a NEW Jimi Hendrix album is now out called "Valleys of Neptune"? It got a four star review in Rolling Stone and apparently was recorded and mixed just three months before he died. This is one in a series of many Hendrix albums that will be coming out over the next DECADE. Yes, he made that much music. I could not be happier.

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